“My way or the highway” has to be one of the most self-centered statements one can make. “Do as I say” comes in a close second. I was having a conversation with a close friend of mine a couple weeks ago and all he kept saying was “I cannot make any decisions in my marriage relationship.” Although I had an idea why, I was still compelled to ask him why. His answer surprised me a bit but at the same time explains the topic of this article. I really hope this will open the eyes of every married couple reading. It is intended to get every husband and wife to do a self check for the betterment of your marriage relationships.
My friend complained for about forty five minutes about his marriage and the heights of selfishness he experiences from his wife. “I can never get a word in and she does not allow me to make any decisions in the marriage relationship” he said. “If I give my opinion she just disregards it completely and does her own thing her own way” he continued. “I try to be the leader God calls me to be but she takes the lead in everything, even downplaying my biblical teachings at devotion time and changes my explanation to our son as if what I say makes no sense.” He sounded as if he wanted to cry as he explained that His son approached him numerous times and ask why he allows mom to talk to him that way. Although I said nothing but just listen in, I felt like I was hearing the one word that described the relationship problem….CONTROL.
We all have traits of selfishness needing attention to cause us to want to change. Marriage and self are dangerous opposites that can drastically tear down any marriage if not dealt with. However, not every sign of selfishness means you are severely ill and need help or deliverance. It is when the selfishness is extreme and constant that a husband or wife need to see the red flag. Insecurity is usually at the root of a spouse who always tries to take control. This spouse is misled to think that if he has control of every aspect of the marriage relationship he will be okay and in the midst of his constant insecure behaviors he cannot see how it affects his marriage severely. Such a spouse is usually under the influence and control of a very bad spirit. THE SPIRIT OF JEZEBEL. This spirit does not compromise under any circumstance. Here are four dangerous behaviors of a spouse under the influence of JEZEBEL that every husband and wife need to be aware of.
Jezebel Manipulates
Jezebel seeks to control situations and spouses, thriving on manipulation through emotional tactics, intimidation, and even witchcraft. Queen Jezebel manipulated events to fulfil her own agenda, demonstrating the destructive power of this spirit. “The wise woman builds her house, but with her own hands, the foolish one tears hers down.” — Proverbs 14:1 (NIV)
Jezebel Refuses Correction
Spouses influenced by the Jezebel spirit resist correction and accountability, as seen when Queen Jezebel scorned the prophet Elijah. This refusal to accept responsibility for one’s actions is a hallmark of the Jezebel spirit. “Whoever loves discipline loves knowledge, but whoever hates correction is stupid.” — Proverbs 12:1 (NIV)
Jezebel Hides Behind A Mask
Often times you will never know that you or your spouse may be under the influence of the spirit of Jezebel because this spirit does not come out in the open to show itself. It is very subtle and usually pretend to be not who he is using constant accusation to hide himself. This spirit appears to others to be the kindest and most loving and people tend to draw close to a spouse under this wicked influence because of a very deceptive appearance.
Jezebel Never Admits Being Wrong
A spouse who can never apologize for or admit to being wrong is usually under the influence of this wicked spirit. It refuses to say sorry and never forgives the other spouse when they apologize. This is usually because such a spouse is led to believe that they are losing a fight due to false pride. Jezebel must always win and is never wrong. The marriage relationship suffers greatly in this situation due to a lack of forgiveness on the part of such a spouse which only leads to resentment.
This spirit only seeks to take down husbands and wives, hence causing division leading to divorce. If you are a husband or wife reading this article right now and notice any of these signs in yourself or your spouse, there is a strong possibility that you are being controlled by this evil spirit. The great thing is that you do not have to remain under that influence. Firstly, admit to yourself the truth of it and seek help for yourself and for the sake of your marriage relationship. You have put in too much into your marriage relationship to allow this spirit to take you or your spouse down. This is what the Jezebel spirit’s only aim is. Huddle up and live. Marriage is for life.
…………….”The enemy comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the fullest” John 10:10.
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About The Author
Carim Hyatt was born and raised partially in Jamaica, West Indies. He is one of seven children from the Hyatt family and has grown into a great man of God. Carim had the luxury of seeing his grandparents model a Christian family life while portraying a marriage in God’s image. Carim had his mother in his life also and learned a great deal about values and wisdom.
Carim’s passion is marriage and family. He and his wife, Michelle, are hosts of MARRIAGE IN A MINUTE, a radio talk show reaching all over the world. He has authored two books, The importance of Salvation and Staying Married Becoming One Flesh. His journey has taken him from Insurance adjuster to minister through writing and public speaking. Carim leads men’s ministries, married couples lifegroups, praise and worship along with many other areas of ministry as God has led him. Carim and his beautiful wife Michelle have appeared on Television programs , namely TBN, speaking about marriage and family. He is a great motivator, mentor and loves the Lord with all his heart. His passion is to see every marriage go the long haul while being molded into God’s image.
Join Carim on this great journey as He reaches the unsaved for Christ while continuing to encourage marriages and families.
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